Getting a Grip

I’ve been thinking a lot about the little ones I worked with for my observation hours. I really miss the time in the classroom. What is sticking with me at the moment, however, are some particular moments with specific children. I guess the reason is because I have been catching up with some reading and one of the blogs I read has some very enlightening stories about a new teacher’s first year on the job. I love it because it really paints a picture of what that first year is like, without sugar coating and without over dramatizing. Plus, the writer offers several lessons learned which are good to take note of.
Since discipline, structure and respect have been on my mind a lot, I keep thinking about a particular incidence that occurred when I was doing my observation. This was between me and one of the children with a behavioral disability. This particular child was set to be moving into a LRE for fall. On the surface he seemed like a great kid, and he is extremely bright, but when something triggered him he was out of control with anger. We had a particular problem with him on the playground, where he would often start fights (particularly with smaller and more vulnerable children), he would run away, throw things, and act out in several different dramatic ways. We managed the playground by each taking a post on one side so that we could keep count of the children in our class, know where each was and keep an eye on what they were up to. This child happened to have a meltdown in my area and I had to deal with the situation.
As a student early in my career, and not trained in dealing with ED, I felt very uncomfortable with the task of confronting this child, but in the moment, I had no choice. Even more uncomfortable was the fact that there were other teachers standing nearby watching my interaction. Talk about pressure to do the right thing! At first the child would not listen to me. I felt as if I was telling a brick wall what to do. Then it finally hit me that asking politely doesn’t work the same way with children as it does with adults, and definitely not with children who have a dysfunction in their processing of emotions. So I told him he has a choice to make, he can either do what I asked him or go inside and not be able to watch the Magic School Bus (which was that day’s reward for positive behavior.) Then I stepped back and said the choice is yours, I hope you make a good choice. He proceeded to do what I ask, but not before he screamed “I hate you” and then ran off in a mad fury, pushing down a small child on his way, at which point I yelled for the TA to catch him when he ran by. I felt like I took one step forward, then two giant steps back. His behavior problems escalated that day, and the days surrounding that one were just as bad. He had been showing up to school in a certain form and getting worse as the day went on. We finally figured that something must be going on at home that triggered him before he even got to school. None the less, I felt like a failure. I didn't know how to handle the situation myself.
Lately though, I wonder how much of this problem is the ED, or how much of it is typical problems that I will encounter with kids. It’s easy to think that this boy was different, but maybe he isn’t as different as I think. Just because he had the ED label placed upon him doesn’t mean there aren’t other kids just like that who don’t have that label but do have the problems addressing their emotional needs the same way he does. Plus, when I consider that this child was being moved into an inclusive classroom, I realize that he has now become part of the mainstream and those problems will not be dealt with by someone with specialized training in behavioral disorders, but are now the responsibility of the general education teacher.
The big question hangs in my mind, how does one prepare themselves for dealing with difficult children? I don’t think positive re-enforcement is enough for this child. I’m not sure what will be most effective. I kind of wish I could observe him for a while longer and see how he reacts to his new environment. I wonder if it will be better for him or if it will be a trigger? There are so many questions floating in my head as I think about his journey into the second grade. I really wish I could be there to learn some more from him. I can’t even express the lasting impression all those children have had on me.